Lessons for the so called "educated ones"

1) First and foremost remember you are dealing with real kids with real parents and real siblings with real feelings.

2) Don't assume that you know what we are going through because unless you live it everyday, you don't have a clue.

3) Know that you can make a difference in a families and child's life if you truly want to.

4) Make sure you have a plan in place when you discuss with the parents a child's future. Give the parents options and hope. Don't just drop the bomb on them and walk away.

5) Be flexible because they are no two children that are exactly the same.

6) Don't play games, be up front from the beginning.

7) Educate yourself read a book or something about kids with a variety of disabilities, why should us parents have to educate you.

8) This never gets easier for us, we might be able to hold the tears back for a little longer now, but the pain and loss is never far behind.

9) Never put labels or limits on our kido's they amaze us everyday and their possibilities are still unlimited, God said so.

10) Remember, these kidos have rights, yes, rights and they are strong and parents are more than ever ready to fight for them.

11) We are no longer in a world where there are only a handful of kids with disabilities. There is an epidemic of these kidos and the world needs to open their eyes.

12) Don't assume that we only want our kids to be mainstream because it's easy, that's the furthest thing from the truth, their is nothing easy about mainstreaming a child with a disability. The looks and comments from other parents, kids looking at your child as if they were a freak. Teachers whispering behind your back. These are all real things and we as parents are well aware. Knowing that other parents aren't thrilled with your child being in their precious perfect child's classroom. (We've all been guilty of that one). And maybe just maybe your own child might learn a thing or two from our not so perfect children.

13) For the education system for Gods sake educate these teachers with real life lessons. With the growing epidemic of autism and development delays,down syndrome kids, give these general ed teachers more than 6 hours of schooling on how to deal with kids with special needs. They are lost, they don't have a clue. We as parents are the ones educating them.

14) Remember, you feel no different about your kids then we do about ours. We will fight for them to the end.

15) For those parents who say "what about our kids" well, I have four of those kids and some have and some have not had kids with disability is their classroom. For the ones who have, (even before I had Joe) their education was not or has not be affected in anyway by having a special needs kido in their class. I

This is a true lesson to all, including myself, my mom always would say "never say never" when I would say "oh, I would never do that or that couldn't happen to me", because sometimes we just don't get a choice in life, God has his plan. A friend sent me an e-mail today saying that "he (joe) couldn't be in a better family in the whole world than yours"(thanks dave) and I have to believe that God gave us Joe knowing that we would take good care of him and that's exactly what we intend on doing. Joe is right where he's supposed to be. In our large, loving, crazy, caring family.